Feel-Good Romantic Comedy

All month, I've been seeing ads for a new movie I won't be going to see. According to ads earlier this month, "PS I Love You" is about a woman who is totally in love with her husband. He loves her. This sounds great! He evidently dies early in the movie. She receives letters from him after he dies. And according to the ads, these letters and things he asks her to go and do evidently help her deal with his death. The ads show her getting drunk and singing karaoke. I'm not sure any of the things she is doing would help me deal with my husband dying. But this is a movie.

The ads changed. In mid-December, I noticed the ads stopped mentioning that the husband dies. Scenes with him are in the commercials MORE. The voice-over tells me this is the best romantic comedy of the season. They still show her getting drunk and singing karaoke. They just don't mention why. So now, someone who is just seeing these ads won't realise that this "romantic comedy" is about a woman's husband dying. Evidently her trying to pick up the pieces after his sudden death is the fodder for comedy.

Did the movie get recut this month? Will I really find a young widow dealing with her young husband's death funny? Does a movie like this come out every Xmas? I feel like every Xmas, we're hit with a movie about a young couple being torn apart by one of them suddenly dying or finally succumbing to a deadly disease. I just don't remember those marketed as COMEDIES.

Well, I'm not too worried. I imagine nobody will go see this movie anyway. But the commercials are bothering me.

Posted at 05:00 AM in That's Bad Marketing | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

My SUV is Not The Devil

I know there is a lot of talk about SUVs not being green or environmentally friendly. I'm not going to say they are. But I will say this.

My current car is a 2007 Toyota 4Runner, 2WD V6 model. I am getting 23.1 mpg on average across all of my local and highway driving. I mostly drive our local roads, whose speed limits range from 35 to 55.

My previous car was the small and sporty 2005 Scion tC (think Toyota Celica), V4 model. I was getting around 26 mpg across all of my driving.

My sister at one point had a Volvo C70 I think it was, and that was in the late 1990's. She told me it got around 13 mpg.

When I recently visited Disney World in Florida, they drove me around in a new Cadillac DeVille. It had a readout that said what gas mileage it was getting, and it showed 14.3 mpg.

I'm not sure the SUVs are the biggest problem. It sounds like some of the sedans are worse gas guzzlers than many of the SUVs. So stop demonising me and my SUV.

We do plan to get a second car that is small and very fuel efficient so that we can only use the SUV when we need the seating/cargo room. We'll do our best. :)

Posted at 05:00 AM in Just An Observation | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

So Is Mine

I've lived in Oro Valley, AZ (part of Tucson) for nearly 3 years. One thing that amazes me constantly is how friendly the teenagers are. I mean they're not putting on an act. They are genuinely friendly... when you meet them on the street, when they are working at the smoothie place, it just seems like an entire town of good kids. You rarely see them smoking.

I compare this in my mind to growing up in the suburbs of NYC. Nearly every kid smoked. Kids were bitchy to each other and to adults. Kids working jobs acted like they were too good to make your sandwich, and going to shops staffed by teens was always a nightmare of attitude and bad service.

So what is it? What is going on here that kids are so different? I thought maybe they all had military parents and were beaten into being "nicer." I was wrong. I recently caught up with a boy and girl who work in a local place. I think they're in their later years of high school. I asked them what is up with teens. Paraphrasing, here is what I learned.

• Lots of kids drink. Many kids smoke pot. But nearly zero smoke cigarettes. It's just seen as disgusting around here.
• If you live in Oro Valley, your family has money. There is no "bad" part of town. Everybody here is pretty much equally upper middle class. As one kid put it, you get to a friend's house. His house is REALLY nice. You say, "Your house is really nice!" And you think to yourself, "So is mine."
• That means a few things. First of all, there's no class struggle. Most kids see themselves as the same "class" as the other kids. Second, it means they understand what they have. If they can look at their own home or car or possessions, and see how NICE they are, then they have an appreciation for all of this.
• They kids here told me that kids from the town north of us, Catalina, get bussed in because they evidently have no high school in their town. The OV kids think the Catalina kids range from weird to lame, mostly because the Catalina kids have a chip on their shoulder. That chip is the class struggle. The Catalina kids don't have what the OV kids have, and I guess they have some sort of attitude. It sounds like the kids here don't play into that much. They just think those kids are weird and should lighten up.

I've rarely met a kid from Long Island who had an appreciation for what he or she had... who didn't feel a class struggle with those perceived as richer or poorer. I've spoken to Long Island kids who have told me that the whole school will judge their status by which cell phone they had, so they always had to have the newest and best cell phones for that status.

When I spoke at my high school some years ago, I spent the day watching the kids in the hallways before my talk. When I spoke to them, I told them that they all look at and treat each other like "my retro bellbottoms cost more than your retro bellbottoms." I could SEE the class struggle even just in the hallways... the looks they shot each other, the way they treated each other.

That's just not happening here. It's a very different world. I prefer this world. I just wonder if this can be spread around the country to places where bitchy, jerky boys and girls are being raised with some huge (and often undeserved) sense of entitlement.

I wonder how you raise kids to be grateful for what they have without being envious of what others have. That somehow seems to be the key here. It ripples out into everything these kids do and believe.

Posted at 05:00 AM in Just An Observation | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Christmas Music

Starting some time in November, we've all been hearing Christmas music. Probably everywhere. Stores start playing it, usually in mid-November. Hold music has it. But that's not all!

We're offered lots of CDs in case we want to play Xmas music on demand. Even famous Jewish musicians have put out Christmas albums. :)

The digital music channels on cable TV have a seasonal channel, so you can dial Xmas music up there. XM Radio has some holiday channels. One of them is funny holiday songs, all darn day.

If there's one thing I have never heard in my 35 years of life, it's a Christmas season going by and anybody telling me they wish they had heard more Xmas music. I think it's like fruitcake. It's there, we're glad it's there, but when it's gone, we're ready for it to be gone.

So when I saw a commercial on TV on 10 Dec, I was surprised. Our local lite (spelled that way) music station was advertising that they're playing Christmas and holiday music, I guess for the next few weeks. What are they thinking? Do they really think that the average person at work is not hearing enough Xmas music the rest of the day, and needs to hear more Xmas music at work instead of those lite hits?

I don't get it.

Oh and merry Xmas. Remember that music will get fresher tomorrow! :)

Posted at 05:00 AM in That's Bad Marketing | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Spam Email

I had just been thinking about writing about spam email when I read this. I have used so many spam filters over the years, and I've finally stumbled on one that's really good. I use SpamArrest.com, and have been for about 2 years.

But it's not perfect. I spend time every day in the "unverified" folder, which is everything is catches as possible or definite spam. I arrange it alphabetically by email subject, and I look for any subject that might actually be for me from an email that doesn't look like a stupid fake name. I then look at it, and "authorise" it if it's not spam.

Most mornings, I wake up to over 1000 emails in the Unverified folder, which require my personal review. I could choose to NOT review these, and say F*** anybody who emailed me, got the auto-email back from SpammArrest asking them to verify themselves, and didn't do it. But that doesn't sound good for business. :)

Some people email me, don't fill out SpamArrest's form, live in my Unverified folder, and don't look like an email for me, so they get deleted. Then I might notice a 2nd email from them asking if I got the first.

Note to everybody. I personally answer every email meant for me every day. If you don't hear from me and it's more than 24 hours since you emailed me or any address at my company, you probably got stuck in the spam filter. Give us a call, or check your inbox or spam filter for the email asking you to verify yourself.

Meanwhile, it's a shame and a waste of my time that I get these spam emails. Spammers track every email they send. Somebody should be able to look at a list, and say, "Hey, we've been spamming this address for years and years. This person has never called a single phone number we listed... never bought a product, never visited a website from a spam. Let's take this person off of lists since he/she doesn't fit the profile of someone who's going to buy from us." Most business do that! I do NOT email dead leads. Spammers should know who is absolutely not going to visit that link or buy that products, and eventually stop, turning their attentions to the people who DO. You have someone who has bought Viagra from your website? Stop emailing me and hit that guy harder! He reads spam email and buys from it!

Spam needs a Do Not Call style service like the American government has to stop telemarketers. Since I've been on that list, I think I have received 3 calls, though from the same company. So that list WORKS. Something like that should be in place for spam so I can truly be blocked. SpamArrest's model is good, and is generally working for me, but while people don't fill out verification forms and end up being eaten, it's not perfect. While Viagra ads can appear to be sent from my staff's email addresses, it's not perfect.

As I tend to wake up to over 1000 spams, and tend to get another 1000 during the day, I need something more perfect. I'm willing to pay for it, but it needs to work better than SpamArrest. Otherwise why move and change?

Posted at 06:00 AM in That's Bad Marketing | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Our Top Story Today

Tucson, AZ is a "small market." We are not a big city with the big city news people. We have about a million people spread out over around 900 square miles (the greater Tucson area-ish). Many areas are rural, lots of ranches, and we're on wildlife's territory for sure.

But I like that. I love it, in fact. But with it goes the "drama" that local news needs to show people. Back in NY, every half hour and hour of news all through the morning and evening had mostly new info. Plenty of crimes to report, all kinds of negativity and drama. Here, our 5am, 5:30am, 6am, and 6:30am news are the same as each other. Our 5pm and 6pm news are the same (5:30, they show the national hews half hour, and 6:30 is still like Access Hollywood and Wheel of Fortune). Our 10pm news doesn't say too many new things (we don't have the 11pm news). Channel 4 also does a 4pm news, which mostly seems to be lifestyle stories.

So you can get news programmes all day here, yet not much news. Not much drama here. So I wanted to tell you some of the TOP STORIES of the day and other important news we've heard in my nearly 3 years here.

• The university basketball coach is taking a leave of absence. Many follow-up stories about his leave of absence were the top stories of the day.
• A woman on the university basketball team died. This story was run before what was the big story in most cities, which was about a number of trampling deaths at a Wal-Mart (it was the holiday shopping season).
• A cat named Robert was hurt in an apartment fire. This wasn't a top story, but this story has two amazing features. 1) They didn't ask for any money, but people who say the report sent in enough money to pay the cat's $6K of vet bills. 2) A year later, the news reader says, "Remember Robert the cat?" Well, I did, and they did a FOLLOW UP story on how Robert the cat was doing. He's evidently OK. Fur grew back. :)
• Going to our NBC affiliate's website right now and clicking news, I am shown these stories in this order:
  • A Tucson woman was robbed at the mall.
  • A local woman died after giving birth to triplets.
  • Our state universities will see a tuition hike.
  • Bush's plan to deal with the subprime mortgage crises (this was the fourth story under "news")
  • The health department sent a man with TB to jail.
  • The continued debate over whether an illegal border crosser who saved a little kid's life (on the American side of the border but was sent back to Mexico) be given a work permit because he is being hailed as a hero.
• Going to our ABC affiliate's website right now and clicking news, I am shown these stories in this order:
  • Homicide detectives found human remains in concrete on the south side of town.
  • Our basketball coach will not be back this season (the leave of absence story).
  • We may get rain on our big Fourth Avenue Street Fair this weekend.
  • A local woman died after giving birth to triplets.
  • Ground will soon be broken on what will be the area's biggest shopping mall.
  • House fires happen around hte holidays!
  • The Rodeo Parade needs to make changes after last year's death and the accidents that happened the year before.

These are the types of stories we see, which means that unlike in NY, I can watch the news here. Not so much drama. Way less carnage. I am so happy with our news as it's watchable and mostly not depressing! I love the news readers bantering. They seem to be having fun. Maybe that's because 10 people are watching rather than the millions in the big city markets.

Posted at 05:00 AM in That's Good Marketing | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Guaranteed Traffic

I just had a conversation with someone who had just about been sold on some sort of website that was going to have 50,000 drop shipped products. Most of you already know that I find that business model to fail more than it succeeds, and I'm stlil waiting for someone to tell me they succeeded with something like that!

What was interesting was that the guy on the phone was sure it was going to work because the company that was offering this system was promising him that over the course of a year, he'd get "100,000 in traffic." 100K hits? 100K unique visitors?

More importantly, will he sell anything? Guaranteed traffic is easy. I get emails from companies in India wanting to know if I want to hire them to hit websites and click on links where clicking on links makes people money. That means that I could promise people traffic, and then hire one of these Indian companies to hit those websites, therefore providing the promised traffic. Hey, I promised 100,000 hits to your website over a year, and wow, you got over 100,000 hits over a year. But are those qualified leads? Are those shoppers?

When I shop online, I am nearly never shown a website that has 50,000 drop ship products. They don't show up in my search results. They probably don't show up in my search results because the "owner" of such a website is not the target audience for strong search engine marketing. He's doing a website like this usually to be cheap... hey, I don't have to look at these products, I don't have to ship them, I don't have to take them back. It's cheap and easy, and they'll sell in my sleep.

And why shouldn't he think that? That's what the commercial or infomercial or seminar promised. I hear those commercials all the time now on XM Radio. Just set up this website with products you don't have to deal with, and they will just sell in your sleep. Really? I've been consulting with online sellers for nearly 13 years, and I know NOBODY making money like this. You'd think I'd meet somebody by now who made the money the commercials claim you can make, but no, I haven't.

So beware of anybody guaranteeing traffic. If your system is so great, why not tell me what I can reasonably expect to sell each month that I run that website, and how much time and effort I have to put into marketing and advertising the website to achieve that average. Then, we'll all have something realistic on which to base decisions. Just promising "traffic" when I make no money solely from traffic (I would make money from buyers, not visitors) really means nothing.

Posted at 05:00 AM in That's Bad Marketing | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Why Can't We Just Give Marketing Advice?

We recently got a call from someone who wanted help with marketing. I looked at her eBay listings and Store, and saw a lot of room for improvement. I wanted to change those listings.

She wanted to know if I could just give marketing advice and not change the listings. Well, what if some of my advice is to change the listings? :) I explained that even if I gave her marketing strategies, Adwords strategies, and website promo ideas, what if we're driving people to something that isn't doing the best job making the sale? The sale happens on the item, and I see room for improvement in her item listings. I see room for improvement in her eBay Store.

No, she wants to keep her design and just get the consulting. I wonder who would take on that consulting project. That would be like going to a spa and salon for a total makeover but telling them they have to keep your hair the same colour, same cut, and use the same blue eye shadow that you like. Well, OK we'll just change what you are OK changing... but then will you really be happy with the results? Could the results have been better if you had been more open to change?

So in general, we won't take on projects where people just want our marketing or strategy advice. The best advice executed for a website that's not the easiest to use or eBay listings that could do a better job making the sale is advice that's likely to fall short. Then what happens? You end up with an upset client, someone who is resentful at what he or she paid for "these results."

That's why we won't get involved where we the client isn't open to changes. I mean hey, if you're going to hire us for our recommendations, it doesn't make sense to be closed to some of them while the advice is still free. :) That isn't the roap map to a good working relationship or trust for our consulting and advice. Someone who wants a new look but the same haircut and eye shadow isn't our target client. We hope that when these people are open to our ideas for cut and colour that they'll call back. :)

We think our decision is good marketing for us. I only want to take responsibility for what we do. It doesn't make sense to put us in charge of marketing what might be someone else's poor or lacking design (or total mess in some cases). There's only so much we can polish turds, and only so much we want to be on the hook for the success of marketing those turds.

Posted at 06:00 AM in That's Good Marketing | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

What To Do With Spare Time and Spare Money

http://www.channeladvisor.com/tank/

???

Posted at 05:00 AM in Just An Observation | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

How To Not Become My Landlord

I have been looking at rental homes in my area. I found what I thought was a perfect on using the Multiple Listing Service. I contacted the owners and spoke to them on the phone. Based on that, here is your step-by-step guide on how to not become my landlord.

1. List your property with a big YES next to pets. Draw me in.
2. On the phone, completely grill me about my entire financial history because you happen to be a loan officer, and you're approaching renting your house for $1595/month the same way you approach giving somebody a mortgage for hundreds of thousands of dollars.
3. Treat me like you'll take have to take whatever I look like on paper "into consideration" even though I've been renting for over 10 years, and have easily paid more than $1595/month in many places. I can document this!
4. Tell me that it's mort important to you to find someone who looks like they can afford this than to find tenants with certain personalities or renting histories.
5. Keep telling me how you have already shown this house to two other people to whom you gave applications but haven't returned them yet, so ya know, this house is really in demand.
6. Make an appointment with me 4 days later to show me the house, and tell me you'll call me that morning to confirm the property showing.
7. Tell me that as soon as we get off the phone you'll email me an application so I can get started, and submit it if I like the house.
8. When we get off the phone, email me that you're not sending me an application, and that you'll give it to me when I come see the property.
9. All this time, I've been talking to the wife, but have the husband email me an hour before I'm due to be at the property to tell me that you don't want to rent to somebody with a cat. Nobody had the decency to call. They were lucky that I was here reading email rather than out, waiting for my cell phone to ring, and eventually knocking on the door of the home where they still live.
10. Treat me like I'm a fool for not seeing where you wrote that you won't consider cats and you'll only consider dogs. But it's not in your listing. And your realtor didn't filter me out when I told her I had a cat. She had me call you. And your wife knew I had a cat, spent the whole conversation talking about my finances, and made an appointment for me to see the property. Please don't treat me like I didn't see your "no cats" declaration that wasn't there. If you want no cats, your realtor should have filtered me out so that I never got grilled by your wife or had an appointment to see your rental home. Just a tip!

OK I get it! You are not going to be good landlords! I've got it, thanks! I wrote them back and said that as I was putting off seeing other properties because I thought theirs was going to be perfect, I would have appreciated hearing the NO CATS thing when they decided to not email me the application.

The housing market is still down. I have my pick of rental properties that have pools and accept pets in my zip code. Note to self, don't rent from a loan officer or someone who treats you like one. Considering I'm leaving an apartment where I feel like the front office has no heart, no flexibility, and prefers that tenants lie to them, I think I should be more picky about who my landlord is. I can afford to be. :) Let the rental homes fight over me, the best tenant they'll ever have. :)

Posted at 06:00 AM in That's Bad Marketing | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

No Idea When It'll Work

On 24 Nov, I tried to price some Disney reservations. I'll be heading there in late January to finalise things for my upcoming conference. So maybe it'll turn into a long weekend with some fun. Why not.

A message came up the night before that they would be working on the reservations system from 21 Nov until 9am EST on 24 Nov. OK, I will look around 9am EST on 24 Nov.

I tried. I got a msg that the system would be down until a little later that morning. OK, I tried again after that time. I got a msg that the system would be down until 3pm EST. I tried after that time, and got a msg that the system would be down until 6pm EST. I tried after that and got a msg that the system would be down until 9pm EST. I tried after that and got a msg that the system would be down until 11:45pm EST.

Hey Disney. You must know what is wrong and making this go way longer than you thought. Rather than having us chase your system every 3 hours, can you please more accurately estimate when things will be working again? If some guy working there keeps telling you that it'll be done in 2 hrs, and it's not, and he tells you that 5 times the same day and he was wrong every time, please fire him and get someone in who knows what's going on and when this will be fixed.

Communication is important!

Posted at 05:00 AM in That's Bad Marketing | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Our New Advanced eBay Store Design

We're proud to present our new Advanced eBay Store Design. We were already offering a "Simple" eBay Store Design service, which was mostly the Store header, reorganising categories, and getting meta tags in. Our point is always to make the eBay Store branded for the seller, but the most streamlined shopping experience possible while staying in the paradigm of the eBay Store. Once you break out of that too far, you are showing a typically low attention span audience something they then have to figure out.

Here is our sample eBay Store: http://stores.ebay.com/As-Was-Marketing-Consultants. Here are the highlights of our approach, and why they'll work for you.

• This was designed to match the look, feel, and branding of http://www.aswas.com. We would design yours to match the eBay listing template that we made for you. You want consistency of branding and design!
• The left side column has eBay's categories or your Custom Store categories (however you've set your Store) rather than something that's graphic. If you put graphic links to categories, then it's not dynamic. As you start selling new things or stop selling certain things, the graphics would still show those categories. Our clients prefer what eBay puts in the left side column so that it changes and their categories and item quantities change.
• We've created a right side column for any message or featured items you want to put there. Right now, that's part of the design and would show up on every page, so if you are featuring items, you may need us to go into the design periodically and update those. Or you don't have to have a right column at all.
• eBay Store Promotion Boxes still work. We can make sure those Promo Boxes match the look so that they appear totally integrated and not just plopped into the design.
• Your Store is designed with the same care that As Was puts into everything. We're thinking about the psychology of the typical eBay shopper, the processes and behaviour the typical eBay shopper have, and making the Store easy and obvious to use. Once it's something your shopper has to figure out, you run the risk of "bounces," which are people who hit your Store home page, and then leave.
• It's darn cool!

Through the end of December, you can still catch our 2007 pricing. Our template service package is $1500 and this Store is an additional $1000. On 1 Jan 08, our template prices will go up. So sign your contract now while you can get a deal! Contact us at http://www.aswas.com/contactform.shtml.

Posted at 05:00 AM in Announcements | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Drama Triangle Should Be A Tetrahedron

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karpman_drama_triangle

The Karpman Drama Triange is the psychological relationship between people who are or act as victim, rescuer, and persecutor. It's a triangle because all three rely on each other for a situation. The persecutor needs a victim. The victim needs or can act has his own rescuer. The rescuer tries to fix things. A victim seeking revenge becomes a persecutor. I tend to be the rescuer as I don't believe in being the victim, and I'm not a persecutor.

I'd like to add something to this. I'm taking this from a triangle to a tetrahedron. There are often four players involved in these types of situations or conflicts, and the triangle leaves one of them out.

The bystander. There is usually someone who sees what is going on and does nothing OR tries to get in the way of the rescuer. The bystander never tries to get in the way of the persecutor; if she did, she'd be a rescuer. Consider the people who witness crimes and don't call the police or act out. The people who watch someone harrass or abuse someone else, and do nothing. They're usually the people telling us rescuers to "just let it go," or "that's someone else's fight." They tell us to not get involved.

The bystander gives tacit approval, and may be an enabler (the victim may be an enabler too, but I'm not focusing on the victim right now). The bystander should be part of the "drama" that Karpman defines since that person plays a definite role. He may be someone the victim is hoping will be a rescuer. She may be someone who is stopping or trying to stop the rescuer. Whether or not he/she knows it, he/she is the rescuer's accomplice.

So when it comes to negative situations, which are you, and which would you rather be? I'm going to stay the rescuer as I can't live with being a bystander. I can't watch someone struggle or be abused. I will always speak up, even while bystanders tell me to be quiet and just let it go.

Posted at 05:00 AM in Just An Observation | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

We're Hiring!

Hi, friends and fans. :) We're hiring for our Account Manager position. Here is the job description:

We're in Tucson, AZ. You're wherever you are in the USA, and you have a home office setup where you can separate yourself from any other beings who share your living space! :) As Was staff are currently in the USA, Canada, the UK, and South Africa. We're not doing the India, Pakistan, Philippines, Asia thing.

You…

• Enjoy buying and selling on eBay, and you have great feedback. Your score is at least 100 with at least 99% positive.
• Know marketing, and have great ideas for all categories of seller.
• Are great on the phone, on live text chat, and over email. You express yourself well, English      is your native language, and you’re naturally friendly and patient. You’re a great teacher.
• Know lots of Photoshop and hand-written HTML and CSS. You will often be working on clients' listing templates, eBay Stores, websites, and other things they need. We don't use FrontPage or Word, and neither do you. You won't do the designs, but you will need to be able to change images and alter layouts.
• Write well and have lovely grammar.
• Have a great sense of humour and fun personality.
• Know your way around Microsoft Office including Outlook.
• Can fantastically schedule your own day, be self-directed, and manage yourself. We are not going to tell you what to do and when to do it. You'll get projects and tasks, you'll work directly with clients, and you'll need to make sure you're meeting deadlines and keeping people thrilled.
• Want something that's not your typical day job! Nearly every day, you'll have new clients, new projects, new tasks, and changes somebody wants to something. This job does not fall into any routine.
• Have a suitable home office/fortress, free from distractions.
• Can keep selling while working for us as long as you can balance the two.
• Can join us full time as a consultant or salaried employee.
• Love our work, and want to be part of what we do for eBay sellers!

We…

• Love helping eBay sellers start and grow their businesses. It's our passion!
• We choose clients carefully, so you will love them too.
• Will train you on how to do what we do the way we do it.
• Refuse to micromanage. You need to motivate yourself and meet deadlines.

It would be a great plus if you…

• Were familiar with one or more listing software systems such as Blackthorne, Inkfrog,      Auctiva, MarketWorks, Kyozou, Infopia, and ChannelAdvisor Merchant.
• Have already passed the eBay Certified Consultant exams. You will need to pass that once      you are hired and trained.
• Know how to use Salesforce.

Here are some of the duties in no particular order:

• Editing/rewriting policy text & standard language into clients' eBay listing templates. Installing templates into their software. Making changes as needed (some may be graphic changes).
• Advising clients on eBay strategies that we recommend for growing their businesses. Helping them NOT break eBay rules. :)
• Working with our other staff (programmers, artists, Flash guys, etc...) to get what the client needs and translate the client's requirements into a language that the artists understand.
• Client training. Sometimes, they need extra hand-holding. You can give it to them!
• Working with industry vendors as the client may need our involvement or as we have questions about their system.
• Representing us in our eBay Live! booth. Possible other travel for conferences.

Duties not on your plate:

• If clients want more services, you can quote them, and get approved services going. You are not commissioned, there is no quota, and you are under no obligation to sell things to people. We only sell services to clients who will really benefit from them. No pressure for you, no pressure for them.
• Business development. If another company wants a closer or different relationship with us, our President will handle that.

Interested? Please fill out our employment form.

Posted at 07:45 AM in Announcements | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Door To Door Insurance Salesperson

I recently opened my door, thinking it was my neighbour, to find a woman I didn't know. She had a pile of her business cards and a clipboard.

She handed me her business card, and told me she was a State Farm agent. I said I already had a State Farm agent, and I started to hand the card back to her. She said, "Could you give my card to a friend?"

I thought that was odd. So I said the logical albeit awkward thing.

"Wouldn't I give my friends the card of the agent I actually use?"

"Well is your agent around here?"

"Yes."

"Who is it?"

I told her. She said she knew him. And she said her goodbyes.

Holy cats, that was awkward. Door to door insurance salesperson? At noon on Election Day. To try to get me to give her card out when I don't know her, and she's desperate enough to knock on my door to look for business? Is that really the best she can do?

Posted at 05:00 AM in That's Bad Marketing | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Home Depot TV

I was just watching some of the videos Home Depot has on their website. I watched tips for painting a room with some guy I don't know.

What struck me as odd was that this stuff wasn't commission by Home Depot. This is some TV show or something that they bought or adopted in some way. How do I know? When the guy made reference to where he had bought his supplies, the words "HOME DEPOT" were CLUMSILY dubbed over whatever store name he had said.

Clumsy.

Posted at 05:00 AM in That's Bad Marketing | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Sparks, The Most Amazing Band On The Planet

My all-time fave band is called Sparks. Not so well known here in the states. People think they're a one-hit 80's wonder. But they are geniuses who have been in the music biz seemingly forever.

In 2002, I went to London on frequent flyer miles to see them debut their 19th album, Li'l Beethoven, live. They then did a bunch of fan favourites from years past. Well, this time, they've outdone themselves.

On 13 June 2008, they will do a live show in London to premiere their yet-unnamed 21st album. And how are they going to celebrate that? By playing 20 shows in a row of the first 20 albums, one night for each album, each album in its entirety. Evidently, this will be something like 250 songs in total.

I'm DYING. I would want to see every single one. Damn you, eBay Live! and the idea that I have a budget and some boundaries. :)

I got tickets for my 3 fave albums, and I hope I'll have enough frequent flyer miles by then. I must hear Kimono My House, Propaganda, and Indiscreet. I'd want to hear nearly all of them, but how lucky for me that what I think are their best works came out consecutively.

Can your band do that? :)

SPARKS SPECTACULAR - 21 ALBUMS IN 21 NIGHTS

At Carling Academy Islington, N1 Centre, Islington, LONDON, N1 0PS
www.islington-academy.co.uk doors open at 19.00

MAY
16th Halfnelson/Sparks (1971/2)
17th A Woofer In Tweeter's Clothing (1972)
18th Kimono My House (1974)
20th Propaganda (1974)
21st Indiscreet (1975)
23rd Big Beat (1976)
24th Introducing Sparks (1977)
25th No.1 In Heaven (1979)
27th Terminal Jive (1979)
28th Whomp That Sucker (1981)
30th Angst In My Pants (1982)
31st In Outer Space (1983)

JUNE
1st Pulling Rabbits Out Of A Hat (1984)
3rd Music That You Can Dance To (1986)
4th Interior Design (1988)
6th Gratuitous Sax & Senseless Violins (1995)
7th Plagiarism (1997)
8th Balls (2000)
10th Lil’ Beethoven (2003)
11th Hello Young Lovers (2006)

JUNE 13th WORLD PREMIERE OF SPARKS’ 21ST ALBUM (2008)

At Shepherds Bush Empire, Shepherds Bush Green, Shepherds Bush, LONDON, W12 8TT

Posted at 05:00 AM in That's Good Marketing | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

How To Almost Lose My Business

I was trying out an application in Salesforce. I liked the app. The trial ended, and I wanted to start paying for it. I had set everything up, trained my staff on it, and we all really liked it. The sales person contacted me to go over pricing. Well, I thought I knew pricing since it was on the AppExchange. But OK, tell me the pricing. $14.95 per month per user. Yes, that's fine. Minimum of 10 users. What? That's not what the page said. Yes, they're going to charge me $149.50 per month even though I don't have 10 users. Really? OK, then I'll uninstall the app. OK, they were fine with that.

They were fine with that? They reeled me in. I wanted the app! I wanted to pay for it! I wanted to tell people good things about it. These was NO work on their part to sell it to me. No overhead. I taught it to myself, and I don't think I needed any support. This is found money. But they'd rather get $0/month from me AND piss me off than get $59.80 from me (and more as I grow and need more licenses). Evidently them getting $0 from me and me uninstalling their app and having to find something else is the win-win situation, according to them.

They're out of their minds. I emailed them suggesting that they change their page on the AppExchange to be clearer about their minimum. I know of other companies in my industry that have minimums... but I know they can be flexible. This person isn't flexible. She'd rather lose the business of a happy customer, so what does that say about what I can expect from this company?

Now you have a CEO angry, having wasted time installing this, using it, training my staff on it, making them use it, and now we have to uninstall it because I don't want to be extorted. If you sold it to me with a page that said $14.95 per month per user, you should stick to your word. If you meant something else or have changed your pricing, you should update that page. Flexibility wouldn't kill you.

UPDATE: When they got my email showing that their AppExchange page stated no minimum, they said they would waive it. Good for them! I like this app and would like to use it at the appropriate price, the price at which it was sold to me. So I will stick with it, and hopefully have nicer things to say about it down the road. Hey, I loved it until I talked to a sales person.

I still think that minimums are something that should be flexible. I can't imagine they lose money on me at $60 but not at $150. If you lose money on me at $60, then come up with a higher price per user per month so that you make money. Don't bully me just because evidently $90 per month from one user makes or breaks you!

Posted at 05:00 AM in That's Bad Marketing | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

What Goes Around Comes Around

What goes around comes around. I'm sure of it. I live by it. I do my best to be honest and helpful so that good things come back to me. I point at injustice, and I stand up for people, especially those who could use an advocate.

So it was wild some months back when someone seemed to be trying to sabotage/libel us for no reason.

• It started with me posting http://aswas.typepad.com/hall_of_fame/2007/07/how-to-badmouth.html in response to an odd blog post I had found.
• It continued in the comments on that post, where that author pretended that these were just her personal views and not another company firing shots at us. It got really interesting when someone posted a comment that outed the original author as an employee of the company that was firing shots at us. Aha!
• It ended with http://aswas.typepad.com/hall_of_fame/2007/07/how-to-blog-shi.html

And then I noticed: http://kidsontalks.com/2007/12/03/redundancy-and-back-to-online-selling-basics/ Same woman, same blog. Looks like she got fired from the company who had nothing better to do than fire shots at us. I'm typically sensitive to things like this, especially someone being sacked during this time of year, but I am feeling more like what goes around comes around.

You spent your time and energy trying to hurt our business and take away from our livelihoods as if our two companies are fighting over very few clients. In reality, our target audience is over 1 million eBay sellers, and we think there's enough pie for everybody. We're not afraid of other companies thinking they compete with us... I'm not sure why this other company was so afraid of us. We must really be something great. :)

So to the woman who was made redundant right before Christmas, good luck. I hope your CV reflects all the work you did at the other company so that your future employers can know what you're made of. To the company that fired her during the Xmas season, I imagine we'll be hiring soon... so I'm sooooo sorry to hear that you're releasing people while we're growing.

:)

Posted at 05:00 AM in Just An Observation | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Take Our Survey on TSAMs

http://tinyurl.com/2qpvej

That's the Tiny URL for our survey on your eBay TSAM aka Top Seller Account Manager aka your PowerSeller Account Rep. We're wondering how these people are helping (or not), so we ask that only people with TSAMs take this survey.

Please pass the URL to friends who have TSAMs so we can get as much input as possible.

Thanks!

Posted at 05:00 AM in Announcements | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

All Listing Templates Are Not Created Equal

A few weeks ago, I was in a live chat with someone who wanted to know more about our services. I was telling her how we help eBay sellers with consulting, listing template design, strategy help, etc... What I usually tell people. :)

She said if she already has an auction template, what would we do for her. I told her nothing because we don't work with clients unless we can do a new listing template. I explained that it doesn't make sense to drive shoppers to listings that may not be doing a great job making the sale. That's where the sale happens or is lost.... the listing. So you need your listing to clearly show the item, clearly explain policies, and get people to like and trust you. As icing, you'd want them to remember you to come back again or tell a friend. So we know that most listings people are using could be much more effective.

She was confused. "Aren't all auction templates the same?" Oh my gosh, certainly not. The unique ones are not the same. :) I explained what goes into our templates, and how we're not just designers. We're consultants, and we'd have a team of people trying to help her increase sales.

I looked at one of her listings, and I thought she was using one of those free Seller Source Book templates. It was a shades-of-purple polka dots frame with a shades-of-purple stripes frame inside it with a one-colour-purple squares frame inside it with lattice patterns inside that. OUCH. Freaking ouch. A bunch of things then bothered me:

1. The seller was breaking rules. So the "designer" just sold a template and walked away. Nobody gave this woman any help on eBay rules or her sales. That's a shame!
2. The "designer" was breaking rules! Her credit at the bottom of the template is not compliant with eBay's third party credit rules. Does this person know ANYTHING about eBay rules?
3. This wasn't a free SSD template. She had paid for this. I'm guessing $10, but I think it's $10 too much, especially with the lack of help and the broken rules.

This stuff bugs me. But it does make it easier to explain our service and how different we are. I tell people, if you just want a designer, go grab someone from outside your local community college. If you want a team that are going to help your business grow, then you want us.

What I want to see are people being more honest. Do you offer templates for eBay sellers? Then tell us how much you know about eBay rules and how eBay tends to interpret those rules. How much does your average client's business increase once she starts using your template? What about your template  is going to make this seller stand out, make her shopper trust her more, highlight her item, and enhance the momentum of getting shoppers to turn into buyers? Nothing? You don't know? You have no data on clients? Their sales go down? Just be honest. Everybody should be honest and have real data on how sellers' businesses change after working with anybody out there claiming to be an eBay Anything.

I'm putting this under bad marketing because I don't like how people are not being up front with people. They'd rather make that $10 sale than be honest. I hate those free, $5, and $10 templates, and I wonder if they dilute your branding (since other people have the same ones, so you're not unique), and I think they make you look more amateurish. They weren't designed with branding, marketing, or psychology in mind. They were "pick some colours and a layout." Let's STOP buying and using these, and raise our game.

Posted at 10:06 AM in That's Bad Marketing | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)