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Tuesday, 23 November 2010

Picking On People Is Harmless Fun, Right?

I know people who are nasty. I'd say they are bullies. I've seen them pick on people. I've seen them find something someone is sensitive about, and focus on it. Or share someone else's secret. And in many cases, these people laughed while they did this. Often, they're looking around to find approval and see if others will laugh with them.

So thing one, never laugh with them. Thing 2, call them on that crap.

I've been watching some of the videos from the It Gets Better Project, where LGBT people talk about the bullying they experienced growing up. The thing that amazes me is how many of those people look visibly upset telling their stories. These are people who are in their 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s... they haven't been bullied at school in DECADES... and they are STILL hurting from the memories of it.

I was bullied in school, but not for being gay (mostly because I'm not gay :) ). I was bullied usually for being the smart "know it all" kid, and sometimes for being the artsy-fartsy weirdo. My mother put me down frequently (mostly for being the artsy fartsy weirdo), and my father was as good as absent. I felt like I had nowhere to turn. I fantastised about suicide often. I was sure it was the only was to solve my problems.

I never tried to kill myself, and I think that was only because I had a close friend who tried to kill herself when we were teens. That hurt so much, and she never really told me why she did it. So, I focused on going to college in another state, and starting my life over when I got there... which I did. Somehow, I had my head on straight enough to NOT turn to drugs, promiscuity, or other self-destructive behaviours.

And if you are or have a teenager in a world of pain, you can start your life over too. Go to college out of state. Parents, get your bullied kids to liberal colleges out of state. That's my advice!

Words can hurt. Words can ruin someone's life. Think before putting someone down. If you hear your child belittle another kid, put a stop to it. Teach them that's not acceptable. The people who hurt me were someone's children, and somewhere, they learned that this is how you talk to someone... or this is how you feel better about yourself.

The cycle has to stop. Picking on people is NEVER harmless fun... not for the recipient of the comments, and not for the true intentions of the speaker.

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My older daughter was bullied in school for being quiet and a book worm. My husband and I pulled her out of school and home school both of our children now. They are both sweet and kind and respectful. I immediately reprimand ANY harsh word toward another person. I teach my children to treat others as they would want to be treated or better! To esteem others higher than themselves and always be kind and live with integrity.

I am so sorry that you were bullied beauty! Also, I am so very glad that you ended the chain of pain in your own life and loved on.

(((HUGS))) to you and x0x0x0x

To anyone who reads this...Just remember! NO ONE can validate your existence! You belong here otherwise you would not exist! You ARE a rare and beautiful gem! The only one of it's kind! Meant for a great purpose on this Earth!
<3 U all! x0x0x0x0

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